Dominican wife

Recent Posts

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 10
« Last post by Mathjon248 on December 26, 2018, 12:19:36 PM »
This content is outdated please do not rely on the above information and instead use and and
General Discussion / Re: Are You Waiting?
« Last post by Hilarios on November 30, 2018, 02:50:26 PM »
That's a great message. You're so right, people not only wait until they start doing something, but they unnecessarily wait for an arbitrary goal to pat themselves on the back as well. We all should do that more often when we see progress being made.
Recovery Topics / Re: Why It’s Imperative to Put Sobriety First
« Last post by RufusB on April 09, 2018, 07:40:55 AM »
Couldn't agree more with the notion that sobriety has to be put first. Otherwise it's just a matter of time when you'll slip up. I've learned this the hard way.
« Last post by QuintinMac on February 11, 2018, 03:00:20 PM »
Very wise words, you really need to use all the tools at your disposal when you're dealing with recovery. That certainly bears repeating.
General Discussion / Re: Stress Management
« Last post by Dorgan on September 14, 2017, 03:02:28 AM »
Family and relationship conflicts, finances, looking for or starting a new job or resuming your old one, health worries — these are just a few of the many stressors you’ll likely be dealing with during recovery. Unfortunately, stress is a normal and unavoidable part of life part of living a sober life. So that means learning new, healthier ways to deal with tension and frustration.

I use guided meditation to reduce stress at lunch time. it seems to work.
« Last post by mslmbw on November 30, 2016, 04:32:13 PM »
Thanks for sharing. Happy Holidays!!
« Last post by A MOTHER IN RECOVERY!! on November 10, 2016, 10:06:38 AM »
In recovery we learn so much about life on life's terms.  When those terms show up in our lives we have to discern the best course of action.  Today I struggle with certain terms.  I have learned to feel and when it's uncomfortable I want to fight and sometimes I want to take flight.  The feelings I have at this very moment is very uncomfortable.  I really want to say and do something that goes against what I have learned.  So I came to this forum to express and suddenly I feel just a little better. The uncomfortable feeling I had has subsided just a bit.  I will now use the tools I have.  I am going to call my sponsor and ask for help with these feelings.  Recovery works if you use the tools.  My tool today is this forum and calling my sponsor.  Thanks for letting me vent. 
« Last post by A MOTHER IN RECOVERY!! on November 10, 2016, 09:54:31 AM »

This women's meeting is powerful!  We come together as women to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body.  We support each other old and new! Its pretty freakin awesome! Children are welcome. Its a safe place to support your recovery.  If you have any questions please give me a call 404-263-2478 texting is better during the day. Our email is or  WOMEN DO RECOVER!!!!!!!
Recovery Topics / 5 Fears That Keep You From Getting Alcohol and Drug Treatment
« Last post by mslmbw on October 26, 2016, 02:13:22 PM »
September 22, 2016 by Chelsea -- SoberNation

It can take a long time and a lot of heartache to get to the point in your addiction where you decide that you need alcohol and drug treatment. It’s true what they say – wanting to get better is sometimes the first step toward long-term recovery, but the fear that keeps you from seeking treatment can be debilitating.

What is keeping you from seeking alcohol and drug treatment?

Fear of Dope Sickness

Dope sickness is the worst feeling in the world. It’s a terrible stretch of days that you feel will never end and the only thing that will make you feel better and get you through it is more dope. You lose control over your body, and all you can think about is getting high. You’re wondering how you can get it and who you can get it from until you are obsessed to the point that you feel like you are losing your mind. Dope sickness challenges your entire self, physically, emotionally, and mentally.

What to do:

Withdrawal from drugs or alcohol abuse is depicted in the media in the form of horror stories that can make you feel like you won’t be able to handle it. While we aren’t saying it will be easy, with the help of a medically supervised detox, the most difficult withdrawal symptoms will be eased. Detox can be challenging, but everyone is different and you might discover that it’s not as bad as you think.

Fear of Wreckage

After you break through the dope sickness, there is an array of emotional challenges that will follow, including facing the wreckage that your addiction left in your wake. The people that you hurt, the questionable things you said or did when you were high, the emotional baggage that you now carry is so apparent. It’s staring you in the face and it’s not easy to look at. The more you push it off and think, ”I will just get to it later when I’m more ready” the more it just piles up.

What to do:

The silver lining here is the calm after the storm. Think of it this way, you can start again – fresh. Life has handed you a clean slate that you can start over with and build the life you have always wanted.

Fear of Change

In your addiction, you were comfortable. It was familiar and it felt like home. You used so that you could live from day to day and in your mind, the drugs helped you to stay sane. Now, without them you inevitably have to accept that change is in order. Change is scary for anyone, addiction or no addiction, but change can be good. People live their whole lives without accepting it, but the longer you hold back the longer you stay right where you are.

What to do:

Since change is intangible, you can’t see it or touch it, which makes it even harder to believe in. Try to create a vision for the change you want to see in your life. Write in a journal or create a visual mood board that you can see and reference every day to remind you of what you have to look forward to.

Fear of Loss

Giving up your addiction can feel a lot like losing a friend or breaking up with a boyfriend. Albeit, a co-dependent, and toxic friend, but one that has been there for you nonetheless. You did everything together, and nothing apart. You also have to learn to live without your IRL using friends. Learning to live without your addiction is scary for this very reason and is one of the biggest reasons that you might fear getting better.

What to do:

Any friend who ditches you or gets mad at you just because you want to go sober or clean isn’t a friend worth stressing over. It will be sad to lose your friends and your addiction, but what you will get in their place is so much more rewarding. The more room you make for healthy and happy relationships in your life, the happier you will be.

Fear of Feeling

You’ve been numbed to your emotions and pain. Anything that ever happened to you, you just drank, shot, and smoked it all away. Take the drug and alcohol abuse out of the equation and all these feelings start taking over. The more you sober or clean up, the more the feelings you feel and it’s overwhelming, to say the very least.

What to do:

It’s going to happen and you can’t stop it. You are stronger, braver, and smarter than you think you are. So just feel the feelings and take a step forward anyway. Reaching out to a support group, a counselor, or a sponsor can help you navigate these feelings without compromising your recovery.

Fear of all five of these things is completely understandable, but you should know that you don’t have to do any of it alone. When you share, you can help someone who is in a dark place find the light to their path of recovery. If you are in recovery, we want to know about your experience with fear and how you overcame it.
Recovery Topics / Why It’s Imperative to Put Sobriety First
« Last post by mslmbw on October 26, 2016, 02:09:33 PM »
September 29, 2016 by Kelly Fitzgerald -- SoberNation

Getting sober can be a slap in the face, and I mean that in the best way possible.

Everything is real and dealing with emotions and life can be overwhelming. If you’ve spent time in the 12 step rooms of recovery, you may have heard that when we are in active addiction we are caught up in selfishness and our ego guides us. Although is just one facet of addiction, it can be a tough reality to take. When we get sober we’re left with the daunting task of self-acceptance and taking responsibility for our past, including hurtful things we’ve done or said, and our actions that were motivated by self. But you’ve probably also noticed that in sobriety we are told to put our recovery first. Aren’t these ideas contradictive? Why is it imperative to put sobriety first?

Selfishness vs. Self-Care

I’ve been told that there is a slew of paradoxes in recovery.

For example, by surrendering we find freedom, by admitting we are powerless we become empowered, and we give it all away so we can keep it. Selfishness and self-care are similar. During active addiction, we are motivated by self and we are often incapable of seeing the whole picture. We don’t consider other people’s wants and needs. Then we get sober and we’re told self-care should be a top priority. I’ve even been told that self-care is the foundation of recovery. But isn’t self-care selfish? That’s where we find our paradox.

It might seem obvious why we’re told we need to put our recovery first, but it’s also not unusual to feel like this might be another selfish act. Truthfully, we must be a bit selfish in order to become the best version of ourselves and thrive in recovery. If we don’t put sobriety first, then we can’t be ready to deal with life on life’s terms. Our sobriety must be number one because without it we can’t function. What good will we be to the world if we don’t stay sober first?

Self-care is a concept I never even heard of until I entered recovery. Self-care, who does that? When I learned that people actually take the time to care for themselves via meditation, reading, meetings, massages, time alone, and treating themselves to a meal, I was surprised. Self-care is making sure your side of the street is clear, that you feel good about yourself and confident in your recovery so that you may help others too. Self-care is imperative to keeping your recovery strong and ultimately keeping you sane. Self-care is a continuum. On some days, self-care can be forcing yourself to get out of bed and participate in the day. On other days it can look like exercise, taking time out for yourself, or spending money on a pedicure. If you drank like I did, chances are you didn’t pay much attention to your physical appearance or health. I put my body through hell. In recovery, self-care is one way I get to make a daily amends to my body.

Now that we know that self-care is technically ‘selfish,’ but some selfishness is necessary to sustain successful long-term recovery, let’s discuss why it’s imperative to put your sobriety first.

Why you need to put sobriety first

You should devote as much time to your recovery as you did to drinking. If you do this, you should be set. Sobriety should come first because drinking and using came first for years. It’s time you put what is most important on the top of your list.
Recovery is a continuous journey of self-discovery. It doesn’t stop when you put down the drugs and the drinks. Recovery is a constant journey where you’ll have to work on yourself and your strengths and weaknesses every day. Becoming the best person you can be is hard work.
You can’t help others if you don’t help yourself first. If you want to be a good mother, father, daughter, sister, brother, friend, or partner, you must first make sure you are healthy and strong in your recovery. Once you are stable you’ll have the ability to bring joy and love into all of your relationships and use your sobriety toolbox for healthy coping mechanisms. Just by being able to move through the world with confidence and love I have become able to help others.
Don’t conform to the world, let the world conform to you. Committing and sustaining recovery is not easy, but if we find pride, security, and solace in your recovery you will be able to get through anything. The world can be a scary and overwhelming place, but you can still stay true to yourself. Keeping your recovery number one will help you find your place in the world. Your recovery will allow you to let the world conform to you, instead of the other way around.
It’s not wrong or bad to want to put your sobriety first, it’s imperative. It will not only keep you alive, it will ensure you live a life that you’re proud of. If you don’t stay sober, you won’t be able to live life to the fullest. Putting your recovery first is a form of self-care and the most important one for me.

When I don’t put my sobriety first it suffers. I end up feeling restless, irritable, and discontent and this can be a recipe for disaster. If I want to reach my goals, stay peaceful and serene, and be successful I have to be sober. Without sobriety I am nothing. It has become a part of my identity and it is just as critical to me as breathing. That’s why it’s imperative to put it first. By putting myself first, I put others first. Self-care has transformed the way I do life and it can transform yours. As long as sobriety is your top priority, you will be ready for whatever life throws at you.

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 10
cocaine addiction